Misplaced solutions to anxiety

What are you anxious about? What stimulates anxiety in you? What brings on worry and stress?

Perhaps a thought that says, “I need to work on my business,” and it’s accompanied by anxiety. 

Or, “I need to work on my relationship,” and worry is there.

“I need to find a new job,” and that brings up anxiety. 

“I need more money,” and there’s fear. 

“I need to work on my eating,” and there’s stress.

It would seem in order to reduce the anxiety/worry/stress/fear you need to address what the anxiety is about. And if you address what the anxiety/worry/stress/fear seems to be about then it will help eliminate the anxiety/worry/stress/fear. That seems logical. 

That hasn’t worked well in my experience. How about you?

Here’s why: 

Because the anxiety is not really about those things. Those things are what the anxiety has attached itself to in the moment. Ultimately you still fear the anxiety/worry/stress/fear even after working on those things. Because the mind then says you didn’t work on them enough! Or you didn’t work on them in the right way. Or you didn’t achieve the result that you thought you should have. So the anxiety is still there. You address one issue and then the anxiety moves. It’s always attaching itself to something new. 

For example, if you’re feeling stressed/anxious about your relationship it might seem like you need to work on your relationship to relieve the anxiety. That would also mean you’re working on your relationship from a place of fear/anxiety. And even if you seem to solve the present problem new ones can take its place, which create their own stress.

Another example: if you’re stressed about money and are working on getting more money in order to relieve your stress and you do achieve your primary goal you might feel ok for a little while. But then a new anxious reason comes up on why you need even more money. So more money will alleviate your anxiety, right? The cycle continues. You can see this cycle taken to an intense degree in people who have incredible amounts of money and still have stress and anxiety that they don’t have enough. And since they’re feeling anxious about money that must mean they need to make more, right? 

But if the ultimate goal is to relieve the anxiety then these approaches are misplaced. 

Instead, when those thoughts come up that say, “I have anxiety about…whatever” instead of addressing the “whatever” you can put your energy into addressing the anxiety itself. What that really means is when a thought says, “I have anxiety about money, therefore I need to work on making more money” or “I have anxiety about my relationship. I need to work on my relationship” we can translate that to “I have anxiety. I need to work on my Self and my thoughts.” Because that’s where the anxiety/stress/worry/fear is ultimately manifesting. Turn around back to the source of stress, not what the stress is attached to or what stimulated the stress but the true source. And that’s your Self and your thoughts.

When doing this you always know where to start your work and where to put your energy. When you’re working on the mind that causes all anxiety then you’re working on the anxiety of any situation.

Addressing the source of anxiety doesn’t mean you don’t work on those other things, or that they don’t matter. When you address the true source, then you could work on making more money or work on your relationship, or whatever the anxiety was originally attached to. What happens is then that work comes from a place of constructive energy, of freedom to work, rather than working to try to alleviate your anxiety, i.e. trying to push yourself forward. Working free of anxiety feels totally different. 

And when you address the source of your anxiety you might even end up discovering that the original problem you were stressed about disappears and there’s actually no more work to be done at all.